Confessions of a Lonely Fat girl

Anonymous asked: "I desperately want a guy to care about me." I'm sure more people care for you than you realize. Even people who you don't recognize or even know are still hoping for good things for you. You're pretty much a stranger to me but I care about you a lot after reading your tumblr.

Thanks :)  Yes I’m sure people care about me..but I really would like that one special person

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I desperately want a guy to care about me

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Anonymous asked: I'm somewhat similar to you. I'm pretty lonely and I'm very introverted. I don't think you have to be embarrassed or anything. I know how you feel. We are extra critical on ourselves. I hope you are feeling better about yourself recently though. P.S. - I don't know if you are in a relationship but I have to admit that I do find big girls very attractive and sexually stimulating. I'm a lonely scrawny guy. Maybe...we can be lonely together. Would love to see pics of you or something. Possible?

You should go through my blog and read what ive written about me and relationships, they don’t happen. We can exchange pix if you’d like..if you come  off anon

I’m having difficulty leaving my comfort zone

I’ve been stuck in it for almost 10 years. If something is too uncomfortable, ill either quit..or not even try

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The Person I am:

 Someone who has a close group of friends, goes to see live bands, coffee shop performances, keeps in touch with old friends, has an adorable boyfriend, doesn’t turn down an invitation anywhere and understands how awesome I really am.

The Person I’m Being:

Completely isolated and in denial, chooses to be numb 24/7, insecure and self loathing.

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On My Day Off…

What i should be doing: Grocery shopping, laundry, taking my dogs to the park, being somewhat social.

What I am doing: Eating pizza, wings and poutine ( delivered so i wouldn’t have to leave the house) Watching TV, staring at my dirty laundry pile and deciding if I should have another nap or not.

 Good thing I don’t have any fucking kids

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Anonymous asked: Im a guy, I've been really lonely lately, how did/do you cope with it?

I surrounded myself with 3 dogs and a cat. I wouldn’t recommend it unless you understand the responsibility of owning pets

I have had several questions about eating a mostly raw diet…

For me, it’s not a difficult thing to do, I was never hungry because I always had enough and was properly nourished. 

By  no means was it a “low fat” diet. I would eat avocados, nuts, seeds and olive oil with my salads.

The toughest part is just starting. Once i get going it becomes easier..

When I do the raw thing, My head clears up. I become inspired , enlightened. Happy…very very quickly 

When i start feeling really good…I unconsciously start looking for a way to sabotage it. Like I don’t deserve to be happy. sigh

Ever feel like you’re so emotionally fucked up there’s no hope for you?

daniebd asked: Hi how are you what kind of dog do you have? :)

I have 3.  2 collie crosses and a bichon cross :o)

Bulimia

So the difference between myself and bulimics is I don’t purge after binges
.
I wear my binges.

I feel sick after my binges.

Im not consciously present during my binges.

I developed a fear of throwing up as a kid… Which is why I never started.

What’s worse? Complications from bulimia or complications from obesity?
At least you can hide bulimia..

I’m not advocating eating disorders.. And i certainly don’t wish i was bulimic. just sharing my thoughts…

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Eating 5 chocolate bars isn’t normal.

But I don’t seem to give it a second thought when I do it. Its like I’m on auto pilot.

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